Are you old enough to remember those long distance phone commercials? You know, the ones where the parent and child were able to connect for the first time in a long time, or old friends were finally reunited? There were all of these running jokes about people being so sappy that they cried at all of those commercials. Yup, that was my mom. And yup, that has become me.
It isn’t a bad thing that my mom cried so easily. If anything, I came to understand that it means she truly was appreciative of the beauty and goodness in this world. She cried when someone did something sweet that touched her heart. For example, she assisted an elderly woman who was hard of hearing with the sinks in a restroom. The woman signed “thank you” to her, which almost looks like you’re blowing a kiss. Mom was beside herself, thinking the woman was blowing her kisses and got all teary. Or little kids would come up and give her a hug and set her off. Any sad moment in a movie required a box of kleenex. Or how about the wedding in The Sound of Music?Those kinds of things.
My favorite was when I made my first lemon meringue pie. Apparently it is difficult to achieve perfection in the peaks when making the meringue, especially if it is your first time doing so. Nailed it! When the pie was complete, Mom actually got all teary. “It’s so beautiful!” Yes, we made fun of her mercilessly for that, but I was secretly super proud of myself for doing something so well. And any time you would ask her about this, she would flat out deny that she cried over a pie. I have witnesses.
Then there were those tears of pain. I’ll never forget that night when we got the phone call that her mother had finally succumbed to her own Alzheimer’s. I was almost scared by how hard my mother cried over that. She cried so hard that she actually burst blood vessels in her face. It was weeks before she lost all of that redness. Years later I finally understood why she cried that hard, when I lost her, my father, and my other grandmother.
My father was the complete opposite. He almost never cried. In fact, I can’t even count on both hands the number of times that I saw him cry. His mother was the same way. I blame the British heritage. But I talk about that more over on the other blog where I am honoring my father.
My sister definitely takes after my father when it comes to crying. But I have become my mother, and then some. People have showed me so many kindnesses these past several months since she passed. Every time it happens, I get all teary. It’s to the point where people almost yell at me about it. “Don’t you dare cry!” I remember I annoyed my cousins when I kept getting teary after Grandma died. I think the one even threw a pillow at me when looking at Grandma’s charm bracelet sent me sobbing again.
And you know what? I am okay with it. In a way, it is a tribute to my mother that she taught me how to appreciate the little things in life, to find the beauty in goodness in as many places as possible. Having that emotional side gives me more gratitude. If I ever stopped crying, I think people would actually be more concerned about what was wrong with me. I know I would be worried.
And for those of you who don’t cry a lot, that’s also okay. Not all of us are weeping willows. As long as you are acknowledging your feelings in a healthy way, that’s all that really matters.
But if you do, here’s a tissue for you. 🙂
Catch up on the rest of my 2019 A to Z Challenge posts here.
Read my posts from challenges from years past:
#AtoZChallenge Comfortghan (2013)
C is for Christmas (2012)
C is for Crying (2011)
Read my 2019 #AtoZChallenge Tribute to my father here.